The Scientifically Engineered Worst Song In The World

Crazy science, will you ever learn?

Just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should.

Sure, we could start transplanting monkey heads on humans, but you shouldn't.

The atom bomb sure as hell ended WORLD WAR II, but it began an era of atomic fear and guilt. We ended up with all kinds of hassles, like communism and bad SCHWARZENEGGER movies.

This brings us to the crack team of DAVE SOLDIER and KOMAR and MELAMID, who scientifically created the world's worst song.

It clocks in at over 20 minutes.

The trio has a Web site where they asked visitors to list their most hated sounds, be they operatic hip-hop with cowboy lyrics, swelling harps or marching-band music from hell.

They claim that "fewer than 200 individuals of the world's total population will enjoy this," but released it anyhow.

The site gets very scientific and is confusing.

The guys basically used the thought behind software that figures out the most desirable musical tones, and went the sadistic route by doing the opposite.

The result is elevator music for schizophrenics and those enduring acid flashbacks.

After listening to the track in full, it's not bad per se -- that is, provided you dig batshit, emotionally jarring music, where children sing about Easter shopping at WALMART.

It also features plenty of oompah horns and bagpipes, so at least it's multiculturally offensive.

And we always thought the worst song in the world was whatever CLAY AIKEN was singing at the moment.

The Scientifically Engineered Worst Song In The World

[How long can you make it listening to this song?]