CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #137 -- This Week's Vanity Card

Ever watch an episode of TWO AND A HALF MEN or catch a re-run of DHARMA AND GREG? Ever wonder what that flash of text is at the end of the show mixed in-between the different company logos before the credits run?

Those logos are all called VANITY CARDS. They act as an electronic business card for the studios and production companies involved in the show. Some are very plain, others are more unique.

CHUCK LORRE, the producer, writer, and creator of both TWO AND A HALF MEN and DHARMA AND GREG has a very unique-style to his vanity card. Lorre's vanity card contains weekly words of wisdom from him instead of a big company logo. This paragraph of text is literally flashed up for :20 frames each week and is mixed in-between other companies vanity cards at the show's end.

This weeks vanity card was hysterical. But what do you expect from Chuck?

CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #137
I believe that there is an unspoken contract between those who purport to make comedy and those who watch comedy. That contract states that in exchange for the viewer's time and attention, he or she will experience the simple joy of laughter. Anything less constitutes a breach of contract. We've worked very hard to hold up our end of the bargain. We hope you've laughed. We certainly have. For those of you who have not fully given us your time and attention, we would expect you to do better in the future. Talking to loved ones while the show is on, even if it's to comment on the show, means you're not really holding up your end. Try waiting for the commercials to discuss specific jokes and startling plot developments. Another thing to look out for is eating loud food that gets in the way of hearing all the dialogue (this includes eating in a hurry so your dinner will be fully digested before the folks at CSI MIAMI start poking at cadavers). Needless to say, all phones must be shut off and toilet visits are allowed only if clothing, furniture and slow-moving pets are threatened. In such cases, viewers are encouraged to leave the bathroom door ajar so they can still hear the show (men are advised to pee on the porcelain part of the bowl to reduce unnecessary "stream" noise). If the above demands seem onerous, please keep in mind that we have entered into an unspoken comedy contract. Failure on the part of either party to comply with its terms will result in reality TV.

I'll have to show that one to some of my friends and family. They always talk and offer commentary while "watching" TV, especially stuff I have worked on.

If you've stopped that VCR or paused your TiVo and strained to read the tiny text each week (like I have), you can also view Chuck's vanity cards on his website -- www.chucklorre.com.

My favorite card of Chuck's is 111* from Season 2 of TWO AND A HALF MEN. I've often worked with producers in my TV career who thought like that.

If you've never noticed these vanity cards, be sure to check them out the next time you view TWO AND A HALF MEN.

Chuck is one nutty and witty guy.